Question:
ok, so there's this new guy that i've been talkin to for like a week... He is super nice and I think i really like him. The thing is that I've heard from a person that he has herpes.. I dontknow what all this consist of, but if it matters he is very clean.. I've been to his house.. he has a wonderful famliy. He has admitted other private things to me and I just dont know what I should do. Do I confront him? Also, can you get it, if he has it, by kissing? we have not kissed yet.. please help me..

Answer:
If he has an active sore than you can catch it. Kissing...............only if you see a cold sore. There are 2 distinct types of herpes. Type I is when the infected person will get cold sores around their mouth or face somewhere. Type II is all genital. Both are contagious when there are sores

Answer:
You've gotten the technical answer you sought. However, you also asked if you should CONFRONT this person based on heresay, perhaps from a reliable source.

I would do what i have always done in approaching ANY intimate relationship - discuss history and ask for testing for HIV. The, you can only HOPE that the person hears your sincere concern and will be honest about herpes which does not show up in any tests unless it's active at the time.

I think as a "communicty" that's what we need to need to fight for - a way to test when it's not active. Someone wrote on one of the other boards about it being just an "annoying" skin irritation. Obviously to some it is, but it's also obvious by the replies that to others is MUCH worse than than. Minimilaizing it does not help stop it's spread and might in fact increase it's spread. I would really like to see an all out campaign to more $$ spent to pre-test for this sneaky, hidden menance. For myself, it is not more than a skin irritation - on the one hand - it is also a stigmatizing emotional aspect of myself that I am forced to deal with. It plays havoc on my self-esteem much as I try not to let it.

my guess is that it effects women that way more than men. would be curious to see some studies - anyone know of any??

Happy New Year -

replies welcome - i AM HOMEALONE!

Answer:
hi every body :( i have a friend and i noticed that she have some dark colored rashes all over her body like her neck, arm ,elbows and stomach and God knows where else. i just heard that she has slept around with boys through her corner. and in my family life class my teacher was talking about an std and the symptoms were dark rashes all over her body. i dont know what it is , i dont even know if she has it. please give me some more info and the name on what this might be. the rashes are very dark, dry, itchy and large. and its been on her for a while.

signed curious :?:

Answer:
I don't know if that has anything to do with herpes, the characteristics of herpes doesn't inquire dark spots all over the body. This young lady just needs to go to the doctor or a local clinic to get tested for STDs.

Answer:
Confused ... you sound like you are fairly young and are about to make a decision that will affect the outcome of the rest of your life. Before you do anything you need to ask yourself if you are willing to live with herpes for the rest of your life. It is a terrible affliction and you may have to live with this forever (FOREVER!). You should ask your friend about this but realize that that person may lie to you. Most people, when confronted with the question if they have it, will lie. You need to understand that this relationship may not work out and you could contract herpes from this person and then once you break up you are the one who has to live with it. It is very difficult for a moral person who has herpes and will not lie about it to find a date, a lover or a person to spend the rest of thier life with. Research this illness and if you can live with the consequences then develop this relationship, but if you are young, and you think that you are going to spend the rest of your life with this person that you just met and you can deal with this illness do yourself a favor and find another friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, lover etc. If you don't have it, believe me you don't want it. Ask but don't expect the truth. If that person is honest then that's great, you can make an educated decision. Maybe you should just stay friends.

Answer:
Guest Jan3 10:00 pm.... Sounds more like syphillus or gonorrhea. It is not a usual symptom of herpes.