Question:
I was diagnosed a week ago. I have slept with 5 guys in my life (i'm two days away from being 22) and I feel like an idiot for being so stupid.

I'm pretty sure I got it from the last guy I was with (over the summer, so like 7 months ago) he said he was "clean" which I now know that people use that term losely because they get tested but not a complete STD test which tests for HSV and HPV and all of that.

SOOOO I at the time felt so in control of myself and on top of the world and thought I could handle anything and I made one mistake and we didn't use a condom one time and now here I am feeling like the shit of the earth.

I've only had the courage to tell two of my friends, I still brake down and cry a lot. I always thought STDs were so disgusting and only whores get them, and now here I am feeling like a dirty whore. I'm having a lot of trouble coming to terms with it and I have no one to turn to because no one I know has gone through anything like this.

I was always so healthy, and now I have a disease I'm going to have for the rest of my life because I had sex with someone who I knew was bad news.

I haven't had an ob, blood test said I was HSV-2 postivie. I still naiively have that hope that maybe the test was negative.

So that's my story. I made the worst mistake of my life and now I have to hide my terrible secret from everyone in my life.

Answer:
Hi daisy

You feel like a dirty whore?! You had sex - join the club, along with millions and millions of others! You're normal but yes, you've been unlucky. Having said that, if the stats are to be believed, 25% of women have this, so I guess that still makes you pretty normal!

You've had exactly a week to come to terms with this - you're probably still in shock. I think you've been very brave to talk to 2 friends about it - that's more than I've achieved. It's early days for you, it really is. Keep coming on here, and eventually you'll get all your questions answered.

Welcome to the forum!

Answer:
Just wondering what prompted you to get a herpes test, if you hadn't had an outbreak. Did you have a reason to be concerned?

Answer:
dont beat yourself up....please dont do that...no one deserves this. I also want to express the possibility that you may not have even contracted this virus from the last partner you had.....especially if you havent had any symptoms or outbreaks...chances are its been lying dormant in your system, or at least not giving you visible outbreaks, so there is a good possibility that you got it even before that last guy. My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years, no signs, no symptoms ever and then one random day i got an outbreak....so he had it the whole time and never knew (we firgued it out from antibody levels in my body that indicated a new infection, his were old). But I just want you to realize it is more than likely you got this from someone else before him, even possibly your first or second partner because youve never had an outbreak,....it happens way more times this way than the typical mind set associated with this being contracted from the partner you are or were last with. Either way, you have it and got it from one of the 5 partners, just dont be so quick to assume that it was the last guy...maybe it was, but you really cant know for sure.

i know how you feel though....that dirty feeling....still feel it a lot and Ive had it about a year and a half now. I had just turned 22 myself when i found out so i know the similar feeling of that time in your life when you were beginning to feel in "control" of your life and happy and looking forward to your future....and then CRASH! your whole world is gone....

All I can do is offer my support and maybe it will help since we are very close in age...sometimes it helps to have someone who is experiencing life at the same age and time as you are to understand exactly the kinds of issues you are currently facing. I hope I can help you, as well as the diverse group of people on here. It sucks so bad but to have support makes a difference sometimes.

Answer:
thank you so much for the kind words. It is getting easier and easier each day, but it seems like there are still lots of setbacks I have to deal with. For instance tonight my father making jokes about herpes (my parents don't know). Things like that are just hard.

I guess I just assumed I got it from the last guy, but I never thought about maybe having gotten it from one of the others. Should I go back to all of them and warn them? So far I haven't said anything to any of them, it's still too early for me to discuss it with them and warn them in a way that would be appropriate since I'm still very emotional from it all.

And I got tested because the last guy I was with was more of a bad boy and we didn't use a condom one of the times (the first time I had ever NOT used one) so I figured what the heck I'd get a full test. I'd been tested before for none viral ones, but I decided I'd get a blood test for HSV, HIV, HPV and all of that just to have peace of mine I was clean. Which wasn't what I got, but at least I am aware now and can change my actions.

Answer:
Well you are extremely lucky you haven't had an outbreak, they're no fun!! But, i know how you feel because i always thought like you did "STD's are for whores". i was careful all my life, and never had any sexual contact with men, not even kissing, then i get a boyfriend and i'm really happy. Then, a year later, herpes. i felt so gross and ive only had sex with one guy. But i'm trying to just get over it.
I want to just say that i give you a lot of praise for getting the WHOLE STD testing done and now you are aware. More people should get tested more often.

Answer:
smh1, your story breaks my heart. You were responsible and it sounds like you did everything right.

and I now realize that when people say they have been tested and are "clean" it doesn't mean anything because they probably didn't get a complete test. Before I was diagnosed, I never realized that, and I'm trying to educate all of my friends on it so they can be aware and have a chance.

I'm sure they are all curious why I am so hardcore on STD testing recently, but I'd much rather inform them then worry about a few rumors starting!

Answer:
When i was diagnosed my doctor said that even if somebody does get the COMPLETE test it might not always detect it. Thanks, well i'm learning that it's nothing to be ashamed of and as cautious as i was you know, stuff happens. But we learn, and now the best thing we can do is educate others, so you're moving in the right direction =]

Answer:
Daisy#1, isn't it possible that you have HSV2 infection in the lips, rather than in the genitals? Have you ever had a cold sore?