Question:
I am 26 years old and found out last year that I have herpes 2. I know that I have it, but often times I try to deny the truth. I find myself very depressed and moody and feeling all alone. I know that there are many people who live with herpes... but where are they? I am scared that I will never be able to have a healthy relationship. I can't think of any man who would want to sleep with a girl who has herpes.

Yesterday I was watching a television show with a man I have been dating for 1 year. I have not told him I have herpes; I am too scared. Anyways, during the show a young lady was telling a man she was dating that she was HIV+... and he told her they would take things 1 day at a time.

Immediatly, my companion said..."That's not reality!!! No man is going to want a woman with a STD... he can't 'hit it raw'... television is so fake". Now he has made me believe even more that no one will want me.... I am so scared.

Answer:
well what can you do.... what can we do.. when people can not accept our "disease" if thats what YOU want to call it... there is not much we can do, nor should we need to explain to them why they should stay with us, if they don't want to... i mean if you are able to take him seriously and willing to TELL him your problem and he still can accept it.. i must say you have a GOOD head on your shoulder.. willing to lose him, just to keep him safer..


the way i look at it is that... its not really that bad, i mean sure we will get an outbreak once a year or less, but i try to think of others who have worse diseases.. you know the one called AIDS.. the one you can DIE from. I have found that if i take care of my diet and take vitamins.. too many to list.. and watch my living habits.. i can reduce my obs... by taking lysine and so on... i am able to UP my immune system.. and during the time when i think i will get the obs (everybody is diiferent.. every 3-4 months.. half year.. year or so) i just up my vitamin intake, especially my lysine... i am able to keep it in check, not completely mind you... but the time i got my last ob.. i was out of the country for 2 months and my vitamin supply ran out... so that was my last ob.... but for a good 4 months or so.. i have no obs.. in a time when i usually get obs. ( winter time) i still have none, b/c i am taking my lysine...

so i find that if you take a good grasp on you immune, i mean you take care of your body before an obreaks happens.. preventitive therapy, rather then "onspot" medication... i am able to keep up with life together...

the way i look at it is that... i could have gotten something worse... i think, i can cope with this.. in fact, i can imagine people living with much worser problems.. we "Americans" need to travel more to other parts of the world to see real suffering ... and i am not talking about your mexico trips... i mean somewhere like china, where people would sell their daughters for money (for example)... things could be worse.. believe me!

surround yourself with positive people.. count your blessings...

Answer:
slownique, I thought I had genital herpes for 4 months, but just found out for sure I do not have it. During that time I read a lot about the virus and realize it isn't as bad as people make it out to be. There's a lot of ignorance out there. Look at all the horrible health problems many people have. All of them would trade their disease for herpes, especially cancer, HIV and other horrible life threatening diseases and viruses. Genital herpes is nothing in comparison. Just fever blisters down below. That's all it is.

As far as telling someone about your condition. It depends on what kind of person you are dating. A truly good and decent person wouldn't look down on someone who has herpes. Sorry to say this, but your boyfriend is a jerk. Even if you didn't have herpes you shouldnt be seeing him anymore. What if you're sick someday. Do you think he is someone you could depend on to be there for you?

I learned so much about the virus and I wouldn't hesitate to date someone who has it. If my girlfriend told me she had herpes before sex I would love her even more for her honesty and courage.