Question:
Hello. I'm with a wonderful man that?s had herpes for 10 years. I do not. He has educated me on his symptoms and "warning signs" and we have done a little research together. My question is if anyone with it experiences SEVERE mood and emotional changes pre, during, or post outbreak? It?s almost like PMS but longer. He is 2 different people from when he is healthy to when he begins to get symptoms. It seems to take him a long time to recover from this symptom, if he does at ALL. I try to be understanding and caring when this happens, but it gets difficult sometimes to know how he REALLY is, compared to what his usual state is because of his health. Does anyone else experience this? Or have any tips that he or I could do to help?

Answer:
I have had genital herpes for 10+ years and my husband does not. (At least not that we know of)

What is your partner taking to treat his outbreaks? Is he on suppressive therapy? When was the last time you were tested specifically for herpes?

Angela :wink:

Answer:
The only thing I can say is that maybe during the outbreak he is bummed out and depressed. My mood is WAY different during an OB (who isn't) simply because...and no pun intended....it is a pain in the ass!!!!

My "OCD" tends to act out more while in the midst of an OB. I am sad, I am annoyed.....I try to do things that are pro-active and positive, but always in the back of my head is the little voice saying...."hey, I HURT down here....this sucks doesn't it"......so yeah, it puts me in a crappy frame of mind. Nobody is happy when they are in the midst of an outbreak.

However, I don't seem to recall taking it out on my loved ones and getting THAT cranky. I am by FAR worse when I am pmsing!

So I don't know....everyone reacts to their situation differently. I am sure he goes through a bevy of emotions: pain, anger, even some guilt and fear (of passing it onto you....there is always that fear, no matter how understanding and cool our non H partners are about our status. ) BUT, if that was the case, he should know that you made the decision to stand by him despite his H status, so he should get over it.

It is tough to say, I guess the best thing to do is really talk to him about it. Point out his drastic mood changes/swings. Maybe he doesn't even know it. If it is still bothering him this bad after 10 years I would say that perhaps he should seek counseling to help deal with it better. I do not think it is an organic thing (the mood swings, like PMS is a proven, hormonal disruption) I think it is all behavioral/environmental...psychosomatic if you will.

Answer:
i know that I myself, change moods when i have a ob.
its like a diffrent person, i get alot bitchy*er - annoyed easily- and just dont want to talk to anyone unless i ask for something.
i think its becase when i have a ob i just dont want any one near me to catch it, or cause its just disgusting and think/feel disgusted w/ my self

Answer:
I've noticed the same thing during my OB's. I'm moody, angry, aggresive and just overall bitchy! I warn my boyfriend every time because I know its coming, he laughs. After doing research though I found that a large part of the mood swings is from the medication. Acylovir and the other one alters your moods. Obviously other factors bring about the bitchiness as well but was comforting for me to know that this is a contributing factor.

Answer:
before I had this issue, I always had chronic Canker sores, and I gotta tell you, having 2 to 4 open sores in your mouth causes you to be a completely different person then when you don't have them! I am a pretty social person normally but when I have a sore in my mouth I feel like I can't talk and I sound stupider because I'm trying to avoid hurting the sores.

of course the same goes with an outbreak. Since I've only had two so far I can't tell you exactly how my mood changes (compared to the hundreds of canker sores) but I can tell you it doesn't cause the exact same effects on me personally it just makes me slightly more socially conscious (which I've always been a lot anyway!). But I think both of these changes are purely mental! So he?s probably just bummed out because of the pain and reminder of his problems. Noone likes a constant reminder that they have a problem that they can do very little about..