Question:
It has been 1 week since I found out I was exposed to HSV2 and i am about to do something drastic. I can't see how life could continue after learning one has the virus. I had surgery yesterday, the doctor removed one growth I gad in the rectum area for about 10 months and he's doing a biopsy on a sore that looks open (which I didn't know I had). Life feels like it is over for me. I am in a monogamous relationship for about 4 months now and my bf is very supportive. I just feel so dirty and worthless, I am afraid of the virus. Even to go to the bathroom is a torture I don't even want to touch my genitals for fear of spreding it to other areas. I'm also scare to have infected my boyfriend already, he is going to get tested this week.
I don't know how much longer I'm going to resist this pain.
I'll be 36yo on the 25th of June, and i have always been very safe and clean when it came to sex. I have had several partners through my life and I have no idea who I got the virus from. Sometimes I feel like if I'm being punished for being gay.
Don't know what to do next.

Answer:
Hold the phone!

Hey...Give yourself some more time to digest having this virus.
You will come to understand how your body is effected by it. You may be lucky and rarely ever have an OB.
I, too, had the same feelings of fearing the virus and fearing touching my own body...Nothing was how I knew it. Now after about 6 weeks of learning more about it, I have a better understanding and acceptance.

You are still young and life has a lot left for you to experience...and enjoy!
You are not being punished for anything! It just happened. I understand your feeling of despair, But all is not lost! Please give yourself time to adjust to the news, To heal from your surgery, and to see that life will be good again!

If you really feel like you might hurt yourself...Please get some help First!!

Take Care of You!

(feel free to PM me if you need to talk)

Answer:
It has been 1 week since I found out I was exposed to HSV2 and i am about to do something drastic. I can't see how life could continue after learning one has the virus. I had surgery yesterday, the doctor removed one growth I gad in the rectum area for about 10 months and he's doing a biopsy on a sore that looks open (which I didn't know I had). Life feels like it is over for me. I am in a monogamous relationship for about 4 months now and my bf is very supportive. I just feel so dirty and worthless, I am afraid of the virus. Even to go to the bathroom is a torture I don't even want to touch my genitals for fear of spreding it to other areas. I'm also scare to have infected my boyfriend already, he is going to get tested this week.
I don't know how much longer I'm going to resist this pain.
I'll be 36yo on the 25th of June, and i have always been very safe and clean when it came to sex. I have had several partners through my life and I have no idea who I got the virus from. Sometimes I feel like if I'm being punished for being gay.
Don't know what to do next. What! You are not being punished for being gay unless you are rebellious towards the master who wakes you EVERY MORNING>
SUICIDE?????????? Come on don't do that to yourself, family, boyfriend anyone who cares about you.
You have to give yourself time to adjust, soak it all in, and most and important of all EDUCATE yourself.
Sweetheart, nothing is more precious than life itself. We all are still young. Better enjoy it while we still have the breath in our body to do so.
You seem to have a good mate on your hands.
It might help if you read more posts and especially mine when I first joined. I am only 23 with a 3yrs old daughter.
We can't let this game beat us, we all have to win in the end.
So, who will the WINNER be?

Answer:
It has been more than 1 week since my doctor told me over the phone that I have been exposed to the virus. She said: you already finish the doses of acyclovir, right? ... you're good, i don;t need to prescribe you more medicine for now, then, she dissmissed me. Her cold tone and indiference made me cry. I'm usually a very strong person, I have been through worse things than this, but to learn that I'm carrying something I'll never be able to get rid off made me feel helpless.
I went back to work on wednesday, and my friend Wanda wanted to speak to me since she saw me so depressed. Right before I told her my story, she was telling hers and how she's been carrying the virus for 15 years and how her life hasen't change a bit. She was very supportive and made me realize that after all it is not such a big thing. After all, 1 in four adults in the U.S. carries the virus and 90% of them don't even know they have it.
I am feeling much better now, there should be more psychological support for people who get diagnosed with this illness.
Thanks everyone

Answer:
I'm glad you feel better.... I know deep down that it shouldn't change things... but i was just diagnosed too and i'm feeling the same way as you were. I can't imagine living with this. I'm feeling like it's going to ruin my life... i don't know what to do. I feel so dirty......

Answer:
I'm glad you feel better.... I know deep down that it shouldn't change things... but i was just diagnosed too and i'm feeling the same way as you were. I can't imagine living with this. I'm feeling like it's going to ruin my life... i don't know what to do. I feel so dirty......
You are going to feel better! I promise!
You are Not dirty...and You are not the virus.
You are the same person you were before you had it.

I think there's a grieving period after being diagnosed. Let yourself have a little time to digest everything. It's so new to you.

Try to be kind to yourself right now. Do some things that make you feel good as a person, also pamper yourself a bit.
Time is going to change your perspective, for the better.

I Didn't mean to preach, but your life isn't ruined !