Question:
I've been going out with a terrific woman for over a month now. She and I are compatible on so many levels and we really care about each other. We're even on boyfriend-girlfriend terms now. We've recently had some sex involving oral and touching. Twice since then, she has brought up my sexual history and asked about me being tested. She claims to be disease-free and has tested regularly...I have good reason to believe her.

I'm in my mid-30's and had a few sexual relationships while in my twenties. My early to mid thirties have been plagued by long strings of bad dates and incompatible women (but no sexual relations), which makes dating frustrating enough. I have never been tested for STDs. Shortly after I had sex with this woman I'm dating now, I had some sort of outbreak (a cold sore on the lip and two uncomfortable marks on my genitals). This is the first outbreak I've ever had and it came as a shock...If it is herpes, then I may have had it for some time and I can assume renewed sexual contact was the catalyst for the ob.

I brought my cold sore and genital marks to her attention but she wants to believe they are zits and overgrown hairs...wishful thinking. I'm going to get tested in a few weeks and I'm terrified that she will dump me if the results show positive for the virus. Regardless, I have to tell her the results. It took me this long to find the woman who could very well be the love of my life, the best thing that's ever happened to me, only to be shot down now by symptoms that I never had before. What a cruel joke. I'm misserable. :cry:

Answer:
I'm glad that your getting tested.I don't believe that sex or doing anything sexual can bring on an OB of herpes.It's true you may have had the virus for years and not noticed it or not had an OB befor or you could have gotten it from this woman.She may have it and not know either.

It could very well be nothing at all like your girl is saying,but it's always a good idea to be tested.She didn't seem to freak out when you told her you may have herpes so she may not freak out if you actually do.try and think positive about that.