Question:
I had a very questionable sexual encounter about a month ago and am reaching the half way point of my window period. Most of my anxiety was HIV related, until HSV was brought to my attention. Now, my HIV anxiety has slightly lowered, and my HSV anxiety has heightened significantly, mostly because I'm totally uneducated on the topic. I tried to get answers from other forums but the response was either too vague or too rushed to be totally informative. I got a few links but I think I would understand more if someone knowledgeable answered my questions first hand.

I'm a CSW who totally believes in protection, but had 15 questionable minutes of unprotected sex with a man I got too close to. I never had sex with him before, or after that minor 15 minute exposure and there was no full on ejaculation, or "finish". Other then the risks associated with his pre-ejaculate, I know I risk hsv.
Ok, so his penis did not look infected at all. Also, he's in the military so I'm thinking he probably has better access to hsv tests than I do. I know I can't go by looks alone, but I do have a series of questions-
1) how can you protect yourself from hsv ? Lots of people have protected sex everyday, so even tho you use a condom are you still at risk for hsv?
2) if a man has no outbreak signs, is it wise to have him use any antibacterial (even tho herpes is viral) to clean his area before you have sex?
3) if you're a regularly sexually active person, other than talking about sex and std's with each partner before sex, what's the best way to be herpes aware before the act of sex to lower your chances?
4) does herpes easily pass if the holder is not during their outbreak period?
5)how much does outbreak suppressive medicine like valtrex lower the chances of the person passing it on?
I guess the fact that a condom doesn't save you from herpes makes me nervous.
I really appreciate anyones response, thanks.

Answer:
okay I also failed to mention this encounter happened 7/14. Sicne then I have displayed no symptoms of HSV (discharge, bumps, irritation). I did notice three unusual bumps on my vagina, but I regularly get ingrown hairs. Technically it was the side of my vagina and not even in or on my vagina at all. The bumps don't hurt and did not blister and fall off. In fact they were small, but being that I'm so uneducated I don't know what really constitutes as hsv.

does anyone have stats on the ratio of people who experience herpes/hsv 2 symptoms during their 3 month window period to people who don't? How scared should I be?

Answer:
* Symptoms usually develop within 2 to 20 days after first exposure to the virus
* Could continue for up to 2 weeks
* May be so mild that it goes unnoticed
* Sometimes causes visible sores
* Can last between 10 - 21 days

The infected area:

* is usually painful to touch
* may itch, burn or tingle during the outbreak
* can appear red, raw or inflamed

Other herpes symptoms include Other symptoms include:

* Swollen lymph glands
* Painful inflamed blisters develop around infected area
* Headache
* Muscle ache
* Fever
* Vaginal or penis discharge
* Infection of the urethra causing a burning sensation during urination
* A burning sensation in the genitals
* Lower back pain
* Small red bumps may appear in the genital area following earlier symptoms, later developing into painful blisters, which crust over, form a scab, and heal.


I read this and better understand things so far. I don't believe I have blisters and I don't feel unusual down stairs, but any further education about prevention would be greatly appreciated. thanks guys.

Answer:
can anyone help?

Answer:
Hi Kitty,

On the left side of this forum page there are many links, you can click on a subject and read up. You'll find loads of information! You have many questions and I think you will be happy to find many of the answers there under "resources".

Good Luck

Answer:
Hi Kitty,

I'm like you. I don't have herpes, but just recently realized I don't know that much about it.

1) how can you protect yourself from hsv ? Lots of people have protected sex everyday, so even tho you use a condom are you still at risk for hsv?
You are still at risk because the condom only covers the shaft, but HSV will infect the skin around the genitals. The best way is to make sure your partners have had a type specific blood test for herpes and that they couldn't have been exposed in the 4 months since the test. And that they are aware of what an outbreak looks like, even small outbreaks.

2) if a man has no outbreak signs, is it wise to have him use any antibacterial (even tho herpes is viral) to clean his area before you have sex?
I would think if he washed before and you washed after sex, that would reduce the chances of you getting infected, in the off chance he has herpes and is currently shedding.

3) if you're a regularly sexually active person, other than talking about sex and std's with each partner before sex, what's the best way to be herpes aware before the act of sex to lower your chances?
I'm not sure how enjoyable sex would be if I didn't feel safe. If you don't want to even talk about STD's before sex, you are putting yourself at risk. Your partner may have something and not realize it. I guess the best you can do is inspect the genital area to be sure there is no current outbreak, sores or rashes.

They say most people pass it on because they don't realize they even have herpes. They may have only very small sores and don't think it is herpes. So don't trust a guy just because he says he doesn't have anything.

4) does herpes easily pass if the holder is not during their outbreak period?
They say people who have it have viral shedding about 3% of the days that they don't have an outbreak. That means the virus is on their skin and can be passed on to you.

5)how much does outbreak suppressive medicine like valtrex lower the chances of the person passing it on?
I'm not sure.

Also, I've read that the virus still needs to get into you through cuts/breaks in your skin or cuts/breaks in your mucous membrane. So if you or your partner shaves, then the stubble could cause breaks in your skin which would make it easier for the virus to get into you.

(Someone please correct me if I'm wrong about any of this.)