Question:
Ok so I am starting to accept what has been dealt to me and my fiance is fine with it too he makes me not feel so bad about it which is good (It keeps me from wanting to kill the prick that gave this to me) but anyways now he is starting to ask me questions and I'm not sure what to tell him. We have been having unprotected sex since June (we want a baby if that happens) and he is mainly curious why he hasn't had any symptoms? :confused: I guess my main question is if we don't make love when I think I either am into and OB or starting into one is it possible he may not have it yet? He knows he will eventually get it and is fine with it. I guess I just want to get him to the docter and on Valtrex before he gets his first OB cause I know how aweful it was for me and I wouldn't wish that pain on anybody. Also he heard somewhere that OB on girls are way worse than when a guy gets them is there any truth to that? I think that is all I have right now probly ask more later. And thank you all it is so nice to know that we all have a place we can come to to know we aren't alone no matter how lonely we feel sometimes thanks again -J-

Answer:
Its likely everytime you have sex that he may get it but over time as you have had it yourself your immune system supresses it enough to reduce viral shedding dramticly. This however is a case by case basis.

If your on valtrax and immune system therpy and so is your partner that chances of you contracting it are minimal. This is also pending no how often you have sex and what not. As reguard to your statement about girls outbreaks worse then guys. Its said that males have worse and more painful outbreaks and a higher risk of transmission of the herpes simplex 2 virus then woman.

Lube also helps with reducing transmission of hsv2 as does washing the area before and after sex thats a big thing too. Also hsv2 can be given to mouth by doing oral sex but chances of outbreaks are minimal and shedding as well. The virus is more suited for genitals it really don't know how to behave in the upper part of the body like your mouth.

All strains of the virus are different some are more evolved then others and are more contagious.

I know of several people that have had unprotected with with partners for years with herpes and never transfered it.

Anyway if you have any other questions post again we all here to help.

Answer:
Star, not sure where you read that. Most sources say that while males may experience more frequent outbreaks, both primary outbreaks and subsequent outbreak symptoms are often worse in women (but there are some guys who get it really bad too... with H for every statistic count on exceptions). Males also have a higher rate of getting herpes asymptomatically compared to women... meaning they do get infected but show no symptoms. Partly this could just be due to the fact that in women symptoms are worse anyway, so it's harder for them to overlook their symptoms.

In couples who avoid all genital contact during outbreaks or prodromal symptoms, transmission rates are estimated as follows for a one-year period:

The male->female ~ 10% (some references have this rate even higher)
The female->male ~ 4%

So, your guy may still be lucky and not have it, or he could have acquired it asymptomatically. Hopefully he will continue to show no symptoms. Star is right - people do go for years without passing herpes, and the stuff he mentions to avoid transmission are good suggestions.