Question:
ok, about 2 months ago I went to the hospital thinking I had an infection from "zipping myself" and yeah, it turns out I've got type-2 yay!

I've been with my fiance the past two years and she doesnt have herpes (we had her tested after I found out) and I have cheated on her so it HAD to happen before I met her.

ok, so I took the valtrex and it went away thank god.

fastforward to this week. I started up again in the SAME place, I've already started taking valtrex again and it's starting to go away.

um, how often is this going to happen?? and why is it so localised on me? All the pictures I see on the internet show it as being ALL over. Not that I'm complaining, just curious obviously.

Also, What's the chances that I gave it to her BEFORE my first outbreak occured? We've had unprotected sex quite often before I was ever diagnosed but so far all is ok?

Also, we are wanting to have children after getting married. what do I need to do in order to NOT pass it to the child (if that's possible through sperm) and/or my fiance/future wife.

I've been reading how having a herpes outbreak during child birth can cause them to go blind and such.

Answer:
It's very often localised - that's not unusual at all.

How often are you going to have outbreaks? Mmm...how long's a peice of string??!! It could be once a year, or twice a month. Read up on how to minimise outbreaks - certain food types, exercise, reduce stress and so on.

Not sure I undrstand your question about your partner getting it. She's had a blood test and it's negative - BUT it can take up to 3 months to show up in blood tests, so it's possible to have a false negative.

Herpes is not genetic so neither you nor the mother can pass it on in this way to any future children.

Childbirth seems a bit of a controversial point. Some women choose to have a c-section to avoid any chance of child catching it. Some, (assuming they've had it for some time and it's not during an outbreak) choose to have a vaginal birth. But you'll need to read up on this more.

How not to pass it on to your partner. Avoid sex during prodromal symptoms, during outbreak (obviously) and after outbreak. Then do the things listed above - good diet etc etc, which reduce outbreaks and therefore, asymptomatic shedding (I believe, but again a controversial point).

You don't sound as if the 2 of you have freaked out about it? The best way to beat this is to live life to the full and ignore it (as much as possible).

Answer:
actually, she took it a lot better than I did lol. When I first found out about it I told her she could leave me if she wanted to and her answer was "hell no, it took me too long to find a guy like you" lol!!!

after a little bit of reading and taking the valtrex during the first outbreak I realize it's pretty much just another chickenpox family virus...just an irritating one lol.

and this second outbreak has "kinda" shown me what to expect when I start to show symptoms. Hate to say it but my urethra was itchy for a few days before the "localized symptoms" appeared....and she STILL wanted to have sex with a condom lol.

I said no, no chances and it will hurt a little for me anyway so she's just gotta wait it out.

here's another question. how will this affect me getting a life insurance policy, etc?? Am I in a high risk category now?

whats a prodomal symptom? and how long after an outbreak should we wait? 1 week? 2weeks? Should I continue to take the valtrex after the symptoms go away?? my doctor really didnt tell me much about all this.

Answer:
While I fully support a positive attitude, she may need to read up on it more so she's aware of the risks. Condoms, and only having sex when there's no outbreak, do NOT guarantee that she won't get it.

And you should both educate yourselves about asymptomatic shedding.

The itchiness you describe was a prodromal symptom; it just means symptoms (such as aches, pains, itchiness) but in the absence of any SIGNS. In other words, these let you know when an outbreak is on its way. So you can use them to your advantage, in that they let you know when not to have sex - because you WILL be shedding during the prodromal symptoms.

Not sure what the research says about how long you should wait after an outbreak - personally I would say about a week, but I'm not sure.

As for meds - sorry don't know anything about medication:rolleyes:

But I would say again, that a positive attitude is the best way to beat this, so you both sound as if you're doing ok :)

Answer:
Your question about life insurance intrigued me. Since herpes is not life threatening and does not even require treatment, why would you even need/want to disclose it to an insurance company? It doesn't progress into anything more serious or debilitating, so it shouldn't even be an issue. At least it certainly doesn't seem so to me. I wouldn't even mention it to them.

Answer:
well, the insurance thing is because I always notice the areas about disclosing ANY diseases, std, or medications you take and I'm a noob when it comes to those things...and yeah, I really dont wanna commit insurance fraud since I already have the diagnosis on file....because cant they deny you coverage if you dont sign one of those waivers that allow them to review your medical files??

actually, she doesnt really care about getting herpes at this point and has even told me this several times cold faced. We're just worried about having children was all. I dont want any still-berth children or blind children if it can be helped, even though that's in the future about a year.

I figured the itching was probably a prodormal (or whatever) symptom and even told her at one point it felt kinda weird and then bam, a blister appeared in the area I had the first outbreak.

basically, I'm in the "trying to figure this thing out" stage so I'm asking questions through people that would know.

ALSO, for future reference....what would be the signs of her having an outbreak?? with where mine occurs it would seem to me that it would be up inside her and we wouldnt know she was having one?? kinda weird to say that but I cant think of anything else.

I mean when I had my first outbreak I could barely pee and was in extreme pain when I tried to do so...I just couldnt imagine that happening with her lol.

Answer:
If she were to get it, her symptoms could range from nothing (some people catch H and never show symptoms), to a high fever, swollen lymph nodes, bumps all over the genitals (sometimes inside and out), and aches and pains everywhere, to anywhere in between. If she were to get it internally (not all girls get it inside but some do), sometimes it can cause a discharge, but it's really unpredictable.

How H treats everyone is so very different. Some people get it bad and some people are hardly bothered by it. I personally think a lot of it has to do with individual immunity, cause even some super healthy people have frequent OBs, and then there are those who smoke and drink and do everything "wrong" but hardly ever are bothered by it.

The most dangerous part about H and pregnancy is actually catching H while you are pregnant. During the first trimester the risk of miscarriage is higher and during the last trimester the risks of the baby catching something is higher.

If your girl catches H before you ever decide to have children, the risk of passing H is very low, and the doctors will perform a c-section if for some reason she has an outbreak near delivery time. If she does not have H and she's pregnant, you guys would want to use extra extra precaution (even to the point of - sadly - abstaining from certain activities) cause you definitely would not want her to catch it at that time.

about the life insurance thing... i know what you mean by those forms... if they can find any reason to deny something they will. i'd disclose it cause i'm sure it would turn up if they did any investigation, but i don't see how it could cause rates to be higher (altho I am not in the insurance industry so who knows), since having H is super common and is not associated with a shortened life-span.