Question:
I just recently had my first ob of HSV2.

I went to the doctor a couple of weeks ago when it became apparent the irritation I had was not going away. By the time I actually looked to see what was going on, I was past the blister stage, and had several ulcers on my perineum and anus. I missed a couple days of work. Blood test came back positive for HSV1, neg for HSV2. Culture came back pos for HSV2, neg for HSV1. The doctor seems to think it's a more recent exposure, but I've been with the same man for two months.

I believe I got the virus from my ex-husband, who had it, and I think I just never had an ob, or had one so mild I didn't recognize it as such. We were married for 8 years. My ex and I separated in December of '05. Since then, I've had three partners, one a fling with a friend, one a 10-month relationship, and now a new relationship with a man I plan to marry this December.

My boyfriend had a blood test that came back neg for everything, although he has had cold sores in the past. He recently had an outbreak, and is now at the blister/weeping stage. It is painful and itchy, and his doc has given him a Zovirax ointment until the culture results came back. I feel so bad, because I exposed him before I realized what was going on.

Questions: how possible is it my ex gave me this virus? Is it possible one of my more recent partners gave it to me, but didn't know they had it? Can my current boyfriend and I somehow reinfect each other? Can we trigger outbreaks by having sex while there is still shedding?

Answer:
OK, update: my boyfriend/fiance had his diagnosis of HSV2 confirmed through the culture. I feel awful, because he got it from me--I exposed him before I realized what was going on.

Answer:
its a pretty good guess that if your ex had herpes and you were with him for 8 years then you got it from him. If i was you and KNEW i was with a man who had herpes for 8 years, then I would have got myself tested immediately upon breaking up with him in 05'.......outbreak or no outbreak ever. That was the only way you could have ensured you didnt potentially risk other peoples health when it would come to future partners after that. Anyhow, now you have it, you've given it to the guy you are with now....however, its very possible you have given it to the other guys you were with in between, especially since you are an asymptomatic shedder of the virus, as is anyone who has herpes, some of the time. You might want to let them know so they can be tested, especially since they also might not get visible symptoms, if they did happen to get it.

In terms of you and your boyfriend passing it back to one another..........the answer is yes you can.
Im confused however, that you say your current boyfriend has had coldsores in the past but tested negative through blood? doesnt make sense to me, unless they didnt test him for type 1. He should definitely have antibodies in his blood because he already has oral herpes.....assuming type one based on his history of oral coldsores previously. So, maybe he was only cultured or somehow not tested via blood for type 1, just type 2. Either way, if he has had coldsores in the past then he has oral herpes and even if he hasnt gotten a coldsore in a long time he can still shed the virus some of the time from his mouth without any symptoms ever showing. So therefore, kissing you can transmit type 1 herpes to your oral region, or him perfomring oral sex on you can transmit the type 1 to you genitally.

In terms of your genital infection, that he now has...........if he gives you oral sex, in addition to being able to give you type 1 genitally(from his mouth) he could also acquire type 2 in his mouth as a result of giving you oral sex, but since he already has one type of the virus there I think the type 1 would remain the dominant one orally if he were to acquire a second type orally. Some people argue this but I am going by what I have read on here randomly from real people it has happened to.

Also, if you give him oral sex, now you are putting yourself at risk of getting type 2 in your oral region, as he now has it genitally. Again, some people will argue that since you have type 2 genitally you wont get it orally , but that is simply not true. there is still a possibility, but most people just dont show visible symptoms of type 2 orally but still contract it there and are still contagious some of the time through their mouths as a result of shedding in that region. They just dont know they have it there due to no visible symptoms.

So I hope this doesnt confuse you too much. Basically, if you do not want to get it in your mouth then dont give him oral sex anymore, or try to lessen your risk of getting it by using a condom on him when you do it. Also, to avoid him getting type 2 orally then dont let him give you oral sex or you can try and lessen his risk by using dental dams. In terms of genital sex, since you both have type 2 (assuming same strain.....since you gave it to him) its up to you whether or not to use condoms, as you both already have it. There is some evidence that if one partner has a lot of outbreaks and the other doesnt, then having sex could increase the other partners outbreaks (kind of like transferring more active virus back and fourth) but its really individual and doesnt make a difference for some people. Hope this isnt too confusing.