Question:
I recently found out a family members wife has herpes. I don't really know a whole lot about it so forgive me if I don't use the correct terminology. I feel terrible and so very sad and sorry for her. I can't imagine what she must be feeling. My family member suffers from cold sores as do I. I've gotten them from time to time since I was a small child. I have noticed over the last few years that they seem to come less and less. My pharmacist told me to take Zinc and it really did seem to help. Anyways the way I understood him was he believes his cold sores were the cause of her genital herpes. Evidently from oral sex. I guess she has type 1. I was just wondering if this is really true and if I should be worried about my partner (who also has gotten the occasional cold sore) when it comes to oral sex. I guess the way I've always thought is if someone has a sore on their face I really wouldn't want them messing around in other places. But my concern is are you contagious even without the sores?? Also I don't want to seem naive or ignorant but should I be concerned for myself or my children when visiting them in their home. What percautions should be taken?

Hugs to everyone who has been affected by this disease whether it be themselves or someone they love.

Looking for answers,

sad and confused

Answer:
yes coldsores ARE oral HERPES....so you have herpes, so does your husband and so does your family member you mentioned.......and yes oral herpes can and does transmit to other regions.......especially the genitals. And yes, to answer your question, you can potentially infect your partners genitals by performing oral sex on him and vice versa...him to you since he also has oral herpes. Oral herpes sheds asymptomatically, just as genital herpes does and it happens from time to time without the presence of any symptoms or coldsores present...oral herpes can also spread from the saliva of someone who has oral herpes some of the time. So the point I am trying to make is that yes it is a true risk....though with oral to genital it might take a long time.....its also a game of chance...if you happen to be shedding orally and not know it and perform oral sex ....all it takes is one time for the virus to be active in your mouth and then it is very possible. It is sad that so many people dont realize their "coldsores" are oral herpes and can be transmitted to others through simple kissing and or giving oral sex with or without a coldsore present some of the time.
For your case...since both you and your husband have oral herpes, you have antibodies to hsv1, which some say provides you with a little bit of protection of getting type 1 elsewhere so dont get too worried, just know it is a slight possibility and does happen sometimes but since you have had it for a long time perhaps your virus does not shed as much hopefully. Many people are married for years and never understand oral herpes still has the potential to cause genital herpes if the timing is right and many on this site actually got genital herpes type 1 this way .....also with the prevalence of oral sex being so high in the last 30 years, genital herpes type 1 is also on the rise. It is too bad that more education isnt given about the reality of herpes and about how both types can and do infect either region....herpes is an opportunistic virus and while its 2 different types prefer, so to speak, certain regions, it does not mean in any way that both types dont infect opposite regions. Hope this helps. I am sorry for your family member....her husband must feel awful, as it sounds he never understood his oral herpes "coldsores" could be contagious this way, or at this point in his life......sometimes people havent had a coldsore since childhood so are unaware they are still contagious once in a while without being aware.

in terms of being cautious at their house now......be no more cautious than you are with your own kids at your own house....seeing how you and your husband both already have oral herpes....do you take any precautions at your house due to both of your oral infections?

also keep in mind, you are at no risk of cathing her "genital version" of the same type 1 you and your husband have unless you or your kids ever came in contact with her genital region.