Question:
i have questions, i need answers

i was having pain like a week ago, me and my boyfriend had sex, he went down on me and it hurt like hell, i didn't say anything. there was pretty much ALOT of contact between us, orally, vaginally, anally. what are the odds he has it from that?

i mean like real odds?

poor guys holding out hope that i just have a REALLY bad allergic reaction.

he keeps blaming himself, but he can't be where i got it from right?RIGHT?

i need to know about kissing and stuff

i have HSV2

how can i make sure he won't get it from me?

i need people with real experience with this, because right now i don't feel like breathing a word of my diagnosis to anyone that can hear my voice.

please help

Answer:
I don't quite understand, are you saying you have hsv, played around and then had pain? or you had pain and then played around?

Can't give numbers, but from what I understand, a person is most contagious the days before and early into the outbreak. This is why the order of events is helpful. If you were at the end of the outbreak its actually less likely from what I have read (but I'm not a doctor). Also, I understand that a person will not definitely contract it, but the more contact the more likely.

Would it be helpful for him to know that some people have a greater response to HSV than others? some have big outbreaks, some very little, so even if he contracts the virus, he may not have a huge response.

Personally, I got it from my husband before we got married. He had it and we had sex a lot before I ever had an outbreak and I didn't even have a genital outbreak (that I was aware of) until years later. We used condoms a lot, but not always and his "spot" isn't protected by a condom anyway. So, its hard to tell and there is hope!!!!!

Answer:
That's quite a can of worms you've opened up there, sweetie. Let's see if we can sort this out.

First of all, have you actually been tested and diagnosed with genital HSV, or are you guessing? If you've had the test and it was positive, then I'm sorry to say that chances are fair to good that you both have it now, if you didn't before. If you're self diagnosing, stop reading now, because there's no way to be certain what you have without a test. Many things present themselves the same as herpes.

If you were indeed having an actual herpes ob, and it was in the painful stage, then it's pretty safe to say you were contagious at the time. If your contact was as thorough as you lead us to believe, he may as well have been rolling naked in a bed of poison ivy. Sorry, but there's no point in sugar coating it. Seems like it's a little late to be asking how to prevent him from getting it. First rule is... no physical contact with the infection site during an ob. I have to admit, I'm a little flabbergasted that your dr didn't give you even that little bit of information, or that you didn't take the initiative to learn that much on your own. Well, what's done is done. C'est la vie.

As for him giving it to you in the first place, it's impossible to say without knowing whether he's positive or negative, and only a test can determine that. After your little escapade, he NEEDS to be tested anyway. Unless he shows some symptoms somewhere, though, even if he tests positive you won't know for sure whether it's oral, genital, or both. A blood test will tell you what type, and tell you if it's a new or an old infection, but it won't tell you location.

There is a wealth of information on this site. My advice would be to read it and learn a little more about what you're dealing with. Herpes isn't life or death, but there's no excuse for passing it around because you don't know the facts, and this is a good place to start. Sorry I couldn't tell you everything's going to be fine, don't worry, but I'd just be blowing smoke up your skirt if I did. The good thing is, we learn from our mistakes, right? Next time you'll know better.