Question:
so i basically found this out..
i've been reading some of the posts, and they always leave out how old they are.. so here it is .. i am 13 .. but i am maturing..
so how mature am i?
i've decided to not do drugs, because its stupid really
not to have sex before marriage
decided that all this "gangsta" buisness isnt cool
im starting to be intrested in human psychology and philsophy
that im now resposible for my life and that if i choose not to study, then i will probably end up having a bad edutation, thus not getting to a uni i wanted to go to, thus not getting the job i want..
( but im not mature enough to do my homework and study.. i normally just leave it to the last minute )
i feel stupid coz of the things i did, said coz i thought they were "cool"
i;'ve lost alot of my friends, becaues i wasnt into what i was before..
so basically i only ahve a few friends now.. or maybe its coz i only started to realise what my real friends were.
so i like this girl, but im extremely shy ( i've only talked to her in person for about 10 minutes , the rest, through SMS' TXT and MSN )
anyway, so i realized (well i think this is so ) that i can talk to her, only after i pray about it and talk to God about it..
before, she was my no.1 but then we were sorta arguing.. so i went away, and realized may be that God wanted to be no.1, so he seperated me and her.. so now he's no.1, and she's no.2 but im scared she'll become no.1 soon
i really do love her, not coz she's prtty ( she is ), i know everyone says this, but realy i love the person within, the girl in the inside..
back ground info:
she's a christian, attend church regularly, prays alot.. ( i really want to pray with her and read the bible together )
she's in a group, and most of the group talk about sex and sex realted things, which is stupid really, because they are all virgins, and wouldnt have sex.. i think they talk about it coz it boosts their "popularity".. i also think this, coz thy want boyfriends and i think that they think that if they acted like sluts, then they would get boyfriends, but why would they want a jerk like that?
so i talked to the "leader" kind of girl about it ( to be herself), and i told her to think about it. ( im not sure if i got the message through.. she asked me if she could be what she wanted people to portary her as for a few more years, which to me, means she didnt get the message, because she would know if she did get it, that it was HER decision. )
so i prayed to God to let him decide if she's ( the girl ) worthwhile and that if she's in his plans for me.. well i still like her.. or even love her.. ( yes, i say, love as i love God, my family, my close friends ).. so could this mean that its in God's plans?
Answer:
Your decisions reflect mature intentions. However, keep in mind that you are still 13 and you have the rest of your teenage years to keep along a path of progress. Perhaps it's God's plan, but the best way to discover that is patience.
Answer:
13 is a good time to have your focus on God. I find that most attractive in a guy. Keep God first and pour yourself into learning as much as you can. Makes for very interesting conversations. Just be a friend to the girls as a brother.
Answer:
thats what i want.. i dont mind if i dont ever become her boyfriend.. i just want her to be there for me.. im worreid tho, cause when she gets a boy friend, he'll probably not want me to spend time with her, so we might seperate..
Answer:
I'm not seeing what you want advice on. God doesn't always just "take away your feelings for someone" I hate it when people talk about that. My ex-gf, when she broke up with (Ah what a horrible relationship) said "I prayed for God to remove my feelings for him, but he didn't, so I think he's the one for me, not you" and I just kinda bluntly said, "Well, if you think that. See ya." But hey- I'm going off track. I see people who pray that prayer, and then they don't remove themselves out of situations of where it could cause you to grow affection towards that person. If she is keeping you from having God as your #1 person. You're not going to like my suggestion, but I think you're going to have to cut-back from how much time you spend with her. God is much more important than some girl. Espically at your age. If a girl is keeping your focus from God, then I bluntly have to say, you're not ready for a relationship, and that you need to strengthen your relationship with God, before you can work on creating, and building a romantic relationship.

( i really want to pray with her and read the bible together )
If you have feelings for this girl, as strong as you say you do, where, as you're scared, that she'll become your main focus over God. I would not really recommend this in some terms. Sure, it could be okay, but I have realized from personal expeirence, that it doesn't really help to have someone there you are infacuated with, because it takes the focus off God, and onto the girl. But hey, that's just me.

Anyways. Hope this helps.

Jason.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Kato I just kinda bluntly said, "Well, if you think that. See ya." Awesome. (^_^) Definitely healthier than the inevitable doom of trying ot pursue the relationship anyways. (Yes I called it doom)



If you have feelings for this girl, as strong as you say you do, where, as you're scared, that she'll become your main focus over God. I would not really recommend this in some terms. Sure, it could be okay, but I have realized from personal expeirence, that it doesn't really help to have someone there you are infacuated with, because it takes the focus off God, and onto the girl. But hey, that's just me.

Anyways. Hope this helps.

Jason. Also, prayer and worship are very intimate times between you and God, if you throw another person (whom you are attracted to) in the mix, those feelings (which can get moving quite freely and overwehlmingly (I think I just invented a word)) can tend to be misplaced and, well, Satan will use whatever he can, won't he? I'd suggest if you desire to read the Bible and pray with her, that you do it over the phone or in an open area.
Answer:
Also, prayer and worship are very intimate times between you and God, if you throw another person (whom you are attracted to) in the mix, those feelings (which can get moving quite freely and overwehlmingly (I think I just invented a word)) can tend to be misplaced and, well, Satan will use whatever he can, won't he? I'd suggest if you desire to read the Bible and pray with her, that you do it over the phone or in an open area.
Addendum: Don't let that replace your regular quiet time where you are alone with God.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Caldur Addendum: Don't let that replace your regular quiet time where you are alone with God. absolutely true.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Chris Also, prayer and worship are very intimate times between you and God, if you throw another person (whom you are attracted to) in the mix, those feelings (which can get moving quite freely and overwhelmingly (I think I just invented a word)) can tend to be misplaced and, well, Satan will use whatever he can, won't he? I was thinking the exact same thing. Good job, honey.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Yoda_me07 i just want her to be there for me.. ..
Why? God is the only one who can be there for you and be there for her. You can't rely on her for that! Thats an incrediably selfish burden to place on someone who is only human and is guarenteed to break it without knowing.

You can not place that kind of expectation on people like that!
Answer:
Originally Posted by nix Why? God is the only one who can be there for you and be there for her. You can't rely on her for that! God is the only one who is there for you all of the time. But He's not the only one that can be there for you. And a lot of people don't even have the kind of relationship with God where that type of thing is real, anyway. It is real, obviously, but not to some people.
I'm sorry, and I'm not trying to argue. I just get bothered when people say things like that, where something may be a reality for one person but not for the other.
Answer:
I'm saying that he needs to learn to rely on God to be there for him because man will always let us done in some way or another.