Question:
Hey all.
Basically the situation is as follows.
A while ago, one of my closest friends was planning to come back to church, and I had lent him my bass (as he was our bass player in the church band a while ago) so he could get to practicing. He didn't show up, never contacted me, and this was about the beginning of the year. I've texted him a few times to see how he was and that, but received no response. This has happened a number of times before, and the night before he was supposed to turn up, we were joking about the past. I suppose that isn't really relevant.
What I would like is that I could get my bass back, and somehow, maybe, restore our old friendship. I know, that the second is quite wishful thinking, but I don't think it's too impossible.
The thing I need advice on is how to go about it. Also, I need advice on how to forgive him. I know it's not such a big deal, but I find it hard to forgive him for it because he's done it a number of times. I'm not sure if he still professes to be a Christian or not, and again I'm not quite sure how relevant that is.
Thanks
Answer:
The important thing is the friendship, not the bass (the bass is easy, just go where you know it is, and get it). But you can use the bass as a starting point for a good old fashion talk. It doesen't have to be a talk about old times, but the future, and what real friendship is. Don't be disheartened if you just end up with a bass? Praying.
Answer:
If you really want the bass back, just ask for it. If you're concerned that you may sound like you want him to get out of your way and that all he's worth is that bass of yours he's still got, ask him something like, "You still playing bass any?" Start a discussion, talk about your lives, then worry about the bass. If you strike up a friendship again, asking for the bass won't be a big deal.

If he's not interested in being your friend or whatever, that's fine too. Talk to him still, get to know about his Christianity, and encourage him whenever you see him. It's hard to be a jerk or give a cold shoulder to someone who genuinely cares about you. When you ask for the bass, just be professional about it; I can't see a mature person declining your request to return your bass just because you don't neccessarily get along anymore.