Question:
I turned 30 on Monday. I have not went on a date in 3 years and have not been in a relationship in 8 years. I sometimes wonder if I have a call to be single on my life. Anyone believe in that . Is it biblical?? Ive heard people tell me yes and no. I have this list of qualities written in my journal of my Mr Right. I used to pray them but quit for fear of vain repeption and not seeing the man come into my life. I really would like to get married and start a family but I am not sure if this desire t o be married is mine or what God has put inside of me.
Answer:
I know how you feel...
Regarding a "call"...
A call by definition implies a purpose. So if a calling to a single life exists, it would and must exist for a reason. Biblically, there isn't any mention of a "call to singleness". For those who were single in the NT, their singleness was a part of some other calling (ministry, usually).
Whatever your call may be, God is always going to give you the strength needed to carry it out. Personally, if God called me to singleness, He'd have to give me the power to give up having a family for the sake of His call on my life. I definitely don't have that call yet!
I would definitely keep praying! Luke 11:1-13 and Luke 18:1-8 clearly teach us that persistance is one of the important parts of prayer.
Dunno, this is a though issue. Keep wrestling w/ God. He never fails!
-SqshdPanda
p.s. HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY! May God do even greater things in/through you than last year.
Answer:
I tend to believe that, typically, our "gifts and calling" are best manifested by what we really enjoy. Do you really have a desire to start a family? Then I'd say that God hasn't "called" you to be single. You just haven't found the person God's picked for you.
Answer:
My Brother is 44, He is still single. Was married once about 16 years ago... the marriage lasted 3 years total. She went off with another woman... not sure if that is why he has not had any relationships since or what? .. Guess this really doenst help much. But, Yes I believe that some are not called to be married.-
Answer:
I believe that people who are single are called to be single. People who are married are called to be married. Are you called to be married? You'll only know when you're married. It has nothing to do, I think, with a person's likes or dislikes, but with God's sovereign plan. This is an unpopular opinion, and I'm prepared to state for the record that I don't know anyone except Travis White who would probably agree with me.
Answer:
People who are single are called to be single and people who are married are called to be married? I don't quite understand how that works. People get married at age 30... 50, 18, any ages. They were single up until that point. Are you saying that up until they were married they were called to be single? Now that, I can see, but what you said, as far as I can tell, makes little sense.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Aaron Adams I believe that people who are single are called to be single. People who are married are called to be married. Are you called to be married? You'll only know when you're married. It has nothing to do, I think, with a person's likes or dislikes, but with God's sovereign plan. This is an unpopular opinion, and I'm prepared to state for the record that I don't know anyone except Travis White who would probably agree with me. Well, yeah, my inclination would be toward disagreement. Perhaps you can clarify your position. It sounds like your saying something like "a duck's a duck once its decided its a duck, but its being a duck is determined by God." Don't get me wrong, I agree whole-heartedly that our calling to be married or single is determined by the sovereign plan of God, but it would seem to make sense that God gives us gifts/desires that coincide with said calling.
Answer:
Originally Posted by ChrisHarbison Well, yeah, my inclination would be toward disagreement. Perhaps you can clarify your position. It sounds like your saying something like "a duck's a duck once its decided its a duck, but its being a duck is determined by God."
I think this sentence in his post lets us know that that’s not what he meant: “You'll only know when you're married.” Aaron’s point isn’t that you’re called to be married once you’re married and called to be single unless you get married, but rather is dealing with an epistemological issue: How do we know which is our calling? The point being, don’t worry about trying to figure out whether you’re called to be single or married; just let what happens happen, and try to work towards finding someone and getting married if that’s what you want. If God wants you to remain single, you will.
Think of it as being similar to that question we Calvinists hear so often: "How do I know if I'm elect or not elect?" The answer: We can know who is what by whether they repent and believe. Getting married or staying single is the evidence of what God predestined, like repentance and conversion is the evidence of what God predestined.
Answer:
Originally Posted by magsepi I turned 30 on Monday. I have not went on a date in 3 years and have not been in a relationship in 8 years. I sometimes wonder if I have a call to be single on my life. Anyone believe in that . Is it biblical?? Ive heard people tell me yes and no. I have this list of qualities written in my journal of my Mr Right. I used to pray them but quit for fear of vain repeption and not seeing the man come into my life. I really would like to get married and start a family but I am not sure if this desire t o be married is mine or what God has put inside of me.
A youth pastor I know was single until he was 30 or 31 years old. He had been praying for a long time because he wanted a Godly wife but couldn't seem to find her. People were always trying to fix him up on dates, but he knew he really believed he was just supposed to wait for God's timing. Not long after he asked my family to pray for him, an old childhood friend of his (whom he had lost touch with) started attending his church. To make a long story short, they are now very happily married.
(Just thought you could use an encouraging story. )
Answer:
Originally Posted by Caldur People who are single are called to be single and people who are married are called to be married? I don't quite understand how that works. People get married at age 30... 50, 18, any ages. They were single up until that point. Are you saying that up until they were married they were called to be single? Now that, I can see, but what you said, as far as I can tell, makes little sense. It comes down to God's sovereign ordination of our lives. Travis explained it better than I did, but there's an element here that I think you got right, and he missed. A person who is single is called to be single. If they weren't, they'd be married. If that person gets married, they were called to be single until they got married. Yes. After all,
Psa 37:23 The steps of a man are established by the LORD, And He delights in his way.
Pro 16:9 The mind of man plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps.
Pro 20:24 Man's steps are ordained by the LORD, How then can man understand his way?
Jer 10:23 I know, O LORD, that a man's way is not in himself, Nor is it in a man who walks to direct his steps.
I think that most people are assuming that being called to singledom or marriage is a calling that begins from birth and never changes. Of course, if a man were called to marriage from birth, he'd be married from birth. On the contrary, God ordains that some remain single for their whole lives, and they do. Others, He ordains, will get married at some point. And they do.
Answer:
Basically it comes down to what you feel the Lord desires for your life. Be content where you are and allow God to use you there. If he wants you to be married he will show you that in His time, not yours. I know quite a few wonderful Christian men and women who did not marry until after 30. There are so many amazing ways God can use you in your singleness, these are ways he cannot use a married person.

Seek out what God wants for your life NOW and if you daily seek that He will continue to show you daily what it is He wants for you and maybe in time it will be marriage but if it's not you should still be content in that. Personally if you strongly feel led to marriage then most likely you will be but it just may not be what He wants for you right now. I hope that helps .
Answer:
Originally Posted by Aaron Adams I'm prepared to state for the record that I don't know anyone except Travis White who would probably agree with me.
I agree with you. I think marriage is an incredible, wonderful, God-ordained thing. But it's not for everyone.
I'm about to turn 21 - never been on a real date, never had a girlfriend. Currently have no desire for marriage or raising a family.
But it's too late to really say "called to singleness" or "called to marriage." I think the goal for all believers should be to live wholly devoted to ministry with and to God's Church and a pursuit of holiness. Keep your eyes open for a helpmate God might bring to aid you in those goals, but press on regardless.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Travis I think this sentence in his post lets us know that that’s not what he meant: “You'll only know when you're married.” Aaron’s point isn’t that you’re called to be married once you’re married and called to be single unless you get married, but rather is dealing with an epistemological issue: How do we know which is our calling? The point being, don’t worry about trying to figure out whether you’re called to be single or married; just let what happens happen, and try to work towards finding someone and getting married if that’s what you want. If God wants you to remain single, you will.
Think of it as being similar to that question we Calvinists hear so often: "How do I know if I'm elect or not elect?" The answer: We can know who is what by whether they repent and believe. Getting married or staying single is the evidence of what God predestined, like repentance and conversion is the evidence of what God predestined. Got it, thanks for clearing that up. I figured that that's not what he meant, I just wasn't sure what he meant. That being the case I do agree...so now the count's up to 4.
Answer:
5... I think.
Answer:
Originally Posted by magsepi I turned 30 on Monday. I have not went on a date in 3 years and have not been in a relationship in 8 years. I sometimes wonder if I have a call to be single on my life. Anyone believe in that . Is it biblical?? Ive heard people tell me yes and no. I have this list of qualities written in my journal of my Mr Right. I used to pray them but quit for fear of vain repeption and not seeing the man come into my life. I really would like to get married and start a family but I am not sure if this desire t o be married is mine or what God has put inside of me. forgive me if what I say is a repeat as I only skimmed what everyone else said...
That list you have may be more detrimental than anything. It depends on how detailed your list is, I guess... but if you have the mindset of that's what you want and no one else will do...
my husband isn't much like the list of what I thought I wanted, but God brought him along and worked things out in ways that only He can. *just my 2 cents*