Question:
My dilemma is in the following. There's a new girl in our youth (Newcomers are 13 years old), and I'm one of the youth older guys (The youth is 'til age 18, and I'm 16 and a half).
Now breathe deep and forget what first came in your head because it isn't this :P
The thing is that she's a very quiet type of girl, and in addition to that, she has a type of approach to people that makes her look very annoying. I mean, she's very playful and a bit childish, plus she interacts with people in a way that make people think of her as "that annoying kid".
Now, I kinda got to know her just a little bit more, and I can see that she's a sweet and nice girl, and she just needs some growing up. And it annoys me when people talk about her in a "I hate that annoying kid" way.
Now, I thought I'd definitly want to know her more in depth, and just be a "big bro" in the youth who's there for her.
Finally, my question is:
How do you approach that kind of a quiet, mostly playful and less serious person in that way (Remember though, I don't want advices on approaching her in a "I like her" way, more in a just friendly way)? I mean, I've did great so far, but I just want your ideas and thoughts about this and the situation in whole.
Answer:
I think this is the best forum. The other one would have everyone assuming the "like her" scenario. (^_^)
But in reality, the advice isn't that different. Go talk to her. Get to know her. If you're gonna be her "big brother" you need to be somewhat close and able to talk to each other.
Answer:
be careful about how you approach her. I used to be 13, and I know if an older guy started hanging out with me, I would think "oh my gosh, maybe he likes me!" 13 year old girls are somewhat irrational and they ALL crave attention from older guys. just make it totally clear that you think of her as your sister and you want to be her brother. if there are no questions in the beginning, there will be a lot less confusion and/or hurt likely to happen later on.
Answer:
Originally Posted by beanbag be careful about how you approach her. I used to be 13, and I know if an older guy started hanging out with me, I would think "oh my gosh, maybe he likes me!" 13 year old girls are somewhat irrational and they ALL crave attention from older guys. just make it totally clear that you think of her as your sister and you want to be her brother. if there are no questions in the beginning, there will be a lot less confusion and/or hurt likely to happen later on.
I couldn't agree with you more. I can remember there were a lot of older guys in my youth group, and I would just love it if any of them paid attention to me. I would have no idea how you would go about becoming an "older brother" figure to her without her thinking that you like her. I would say that it's next to impossible.