Question:
Hey, I am in need of assistance. There is this girl I like and I just want to get to know her as friends. But the problem is that I can't get the words out of my mouth when I am around her because of my past history with liking girls. When I first started liking this girl I told a close friend and they told her, and when I liked a different girl, all she would do when I tried to talk to her is make fun of me, and both girls would ignore me no matter what (not because they are snobs, just because I was a guy and they didn't know how to talk to me). So when I like a girl, I clam up. Is there any advice you guys could give?
Answer:
Start thinking of them as just friends. Not built up in your mind on a pedestal and everything. Further, don't tell your friends when you like a girl if they are going to do this type of thing. It's just not worth the headache.
Answer:
I agree with Chris. It's not worth it if your friends do that. And I, like you, used to clam up around girls...especially the pretty ones... But, I found the best remedy is just this...TALK. It gets easier and easier I promise. Now i can walk up to a girl and just start chatting...and it's helped in other areas in the sense of just meeting new people. If you happen to stumble on your words, just slow down. If they are nice girls like you say, they aren't gonna think you're dumb just because you flipped some words around...promise. And with that my friend...good luck
Adam
Answer:
I agree with everything said above me, especially the pedestal. Your mindset should be something along the lines of, you're an awesome individual who can provide a valuable friendship and therefore are of value to them (even if they don't know it), and you don't need her for fulfilling any aspect of your life. That's God's role. Also, that confidence in yourself and knowledge that you don't absolutely need her means that you should feel free to tease her somewhat after you become comfortable around her.
And as for her teasing you? You have a foot in the door, m'friend. That shows that she is already somewhat comfortable around you, at least comfortable enough to tease you.
Answer:
yeah, definitely make sure that you have the right motives. I started being freinds with a girl just because I liked her and, even though we became good friends, it was always a little awkward and now there are really weird circumstances that are surrounding us that I won't go into here.