Question:
OK, I have no clue what to do about this, so I'll ask you guys. Here's the problem: Our praise team has traditionally been a very good, focused group, but this summer we went to a youth conference which was amazing. We came back united for Christ, we were able to look at each other and sense each other's moods and problems. We were close and we were able to worship together like never before. Thus the problem, our lead guitar player/singer (who wasn't able to go to the conference) and a female singer from our group hooked up in the dating sense about a month ago and its obvious that our praise team isn't the same. The focus of our lead guitar is now often times on this girl and not on God, which I see as a major problem for him as well as our group. I don't really know how to deal with this, so any advice would be appreciated. BTW, we're all 16.
Answer:
I don't see the specifics of your problem. Those who are dating or even married have been involved in worship teams for quite some time (Prscilla and Acquilla for example). Worship, as you are aware, involves far more than simply music.
If music is your primary focus in worship, try studying out the doctrine of music, develop a focus statement for your team, and ask all members to see if they can agree to live by those principles. As a result of your study you may conclude that dating is no big deal, or, you may decide it is. Set your expectations for conduct and focus first, from Scripture, before you confront anyone.
Good article on music in worship... http://thefaithfulword.org/music.html
Answer:
Read the Bible as a group.
Matthew 22:36-38 might be applicable.
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment."
Try to find verses that are applicable to the situations of the members of the group: all the members of the group. Everyone has problems.
Any verses that deal with God's character are good for worship teams. What could be more inspiring for worship than seeing who God is?
Answer:
Originally Posted by player123496 OK, I have no clue what to do about this, so I'll ask you guys. Here's the problem: Our praise team has traditionally been a very good, focused group, but this summer we went to a youth conference which was amazing. We came back united for Christ, we were able to look at each other and sense each other's moods and problems. We were close and we were able to worship together like never before. Thus the problem, our lead guitar player/singer (who wasn't able to go to the conference) and a female singer from our group hooked up in the dating sense about a month ago and its obvious that our praise team isn't the same. The focus of our lead guitar is now often times on this girl and not on God, which I see as a major problem for him as well as our group. I don't really know how to deal with this, so any advice would be appreciated. BTW, we're all 16.
i want to ask you a pointed question. how do you know your bassist is not focusing on lunch? or your drummer on slyly impressing the ladies.
ultimately, it comes down to their word, and their ministry. you can't really discern the workings of their hearts. hw would it be a problem? And how could you possibly guard against the secret thoughts of men's hearts?
Bob gave good advice on how to set the focus, id also reccomend praying as agroup for focus.
Answer:
how could you possibly guard against the secret thoughts of men's hearts? You can't, but if there's an obvious problem that's no longer a secret, should you not deal with it? I'm not saying kick the guy out or anything, but I'd talk to him about it (or if you're not in charge, see if whoever is in charge will talk to him about it). Bob's advice is good.
Answer:
OK, I guess I am overreacting. I have no problem with the two of them dating, but I've noticed that our lead guitarist is often rushing through the songs during practice and worship time simply so that he can get back to talking and hanging out with her. I'm simply afraid that the focus of our worship time has shifted from glorifying God, to another time that they can hang out together, which is sort of what I've observed. Also, we do have Bible studies together. I was just trying to figure out if this was something that I should talk to them about or just wait and see what happens.
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I'd talk to him about it. God deserves more devotion than people do.
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oh, Id talk to him about it, but if he denies it, you have no recourse.
Answer:
I agree with that ^ communication is the best solution (it seems you've already assessed the situation...) The only recourse you have is to communicate your feelings and observations and try to help him refocus on the task at hand... I have no problem with the two of them dating or whatever I thinks that's wonderful, but if he's not focusing on the reason he's there for practise... then that's where you focus and hopefully you can enable him to see he's lost focus and help him get back on track... it happens to everyone regardless of the reason... many times we can become unaware of our behaviour ...especially in this situation.
I've seen it far too often in bands I've been in and not only that but at work where my employees have become romantically involved or one had a "crush" on another ... all you can do is make the suggestion that it's generally not a good idea to get involved with someone you work with and hope things go smoothly if it happens... but generally there's nothing you can do. Love is just too powerful and all you can do is let it run its course. ... and I must say that the worst case scenario is when two people are in love or whatever and the relationship doesn't work out and the two have to work together closely! Anyway, I'm rambling! Just communicate and don't get too hung up on their relationship that shouldn't be an issue as far as you're concerned. I'm certain it will all work out if you keep the communication lines open.
Answer:
First off, I'd like to say one thing no one else mentioned. Do your best not to make them feel like they're inferior/ uneducated/ leftout because they didn't go to the conference. If you do make them feel that way, everything you learned at the conference is useless.
When I was on the worship team at my old church, there was a guy who pretty much joined so he could spend more time with his girlfriend (it was pretty obvious since he came to practices to be with her before he ever joined). and it did cause a problem with the team because he was not focused on God or the music...
So pretty much the same situation only I was the lead guitarist, and all of us were older. I left the church for other reasons before this issue was ever resolved, so I can't tell you a sure fire way to work through it, but you should pretty much just do what everyone else here has said.
You should definately say something whenever any of your fellow musicians seem to be loosing focus regardless of the aparent reason. But don't be too accusing. Be willing to have grace on him and even to accept that your suspicion is wrong if that's the case. Make sure somebody talks to the girl as well. And don't try to kick either of them off the team except as a last resort.
Also, as always when confronting a brother in Christ about anything, make sure you're not going for a speck of saw dust if there are any planks in your eyes. If you're not familiar with that scripture, lemme know and I'll look up the reference.
Answer:
One thing our praise team does, is if we start to lose focus or things just aren't working, we stop. Even if it's right in the middle of a song, we stop. We pause, and we pray.
You could also use some "musical directing" directing tips and if he (or anyone else for that matter really) rushes through the song, bring it to everyone's attention that you need to practice at the speed you'll be playing it or else it may lead to doing it to fast when you're on. Then try and go back and go through it just once (a verse and a chorus). If he's not truely focussed on God, this may help to snap him back into reality.
One thing our team regularly does is devotions before every practice. (not so much right now, we should really get on top of that one... (Hmm? Oh I'm thinking out loud again)). Bring devotions that deal with focussing on God, giving everything to God, and stuff like that. In my team we had a HUGE problem with people complaining about certain songs (because they didn't like the speed, or they didn't like the way the music went, etc) or the length of practices. I brought a very risky devotion dealing with that subject. It really could have gone either way, everyone gets mad at me or everyone figures out that I'm trying to do good. Luckily, it was well received and such behaviour was eliminated... for two weeks. No, they're still good about it.
Apart from that I can't really be of much help. That's about the gist of the problems our team has had. We haven't really had to throw anyone off, everyone who's left has gone of their own accord (to my knowledge, I'm not the official leader).