Question:
I've got a friend that used to be a very good friend of mine.. till about 3 years ago she started really changing.. she got into drugs and drinking with her sister and she really changed, she's only 14 now.. And about 3 months ago she was going out with some 18 year old guy and he accually asked her to marry him... I'm thinking this was some set-up but she said yes... and about a month ago he went to jail for robbery and some other stuff I'm not going to say.. But anyway, she is not saved, and refuses to be.. and I'm not sure why.. but we have a youth conference coming up soon and she said she is going to come to that.. the thing is that I went to one last year with my church and she came along also.. and loved it but when she came back home she got right back into doing the same stuff again.. and this time the youth conference is not as close to our town as the last one was and we have to stay in a hotel and my mom is coming along to chaperone and she doen't trust her.. probably thinking she's going to end up doing something she's not suposed to..
Any suggestions or advice on this??? I'm really confused why she just changed and now refuses to be saved...
Answer:
I understand the confusion, having gone through this with a friend a few years ago.
The reason she is "changed" is because she is (we're assuming, by her fruit) an unrepentant sinner. Our sin nature loves to do everything that God hates. It loves drugs and sex and booze. It loves mocking God. It's something we're born with, the only escape is Christ. And right now, she won't except the gift. Why? Because, we are born hating God. Only God can soften our hearts toward Him, and He does that in His perfect timing. Pray for your friend.
Answer:
The rationale behind your friend's change is something probably even she doesn't know, but it seems like she's trying to gain some sort of acceptance. I've found that, at least for one friend of mine that is continuing her own slow collapse, it's because she's just stopped caring. If nothing, not even life, has meaning, then why would you try to do anything to improve it?
Your friend is probably stuck in a rut and, whenever she wants to feel something normal, she goes to that rut. The marriage is foolish, and she may end up self-destructing, but this is beyond your capacity to control. Keep warning but don't try to control. If she's going to change, she'll first have to want it. Keep asking why, and seek to understand the answers. You may find what you're looking for.
Answer:
Your friend is trying to find something to fill her hole in her life. She is testing everything she possibliy can to just try to feel belonging. I have seen this. The reason that she is not going to God first is because wants to try to make it on her own and not feel tied down by rules of God, friends, her parents, or anyone. Something you consider doing is be there for her and let her talk. Her heart is going through spiritual warfare and she will need support. Keep on praying for her becuase that is the best thing you can do.
Answer:
My cousin got busted a couple weeks ago for possession. (He's only 13.)
The only reason he'd been doing that is because it gave him this good feeling, through all the s*** he'd been going through.
Maybe what she needs is a really good friend, someone who she trusts. That doesn't mean accept her sins, but just love her.