Question:
Hey everyone.
Recently my cousin moved up here to live with her grandma because she was getting into the wrong crowd. And her mom didn't want to take care of her anymore. So yeah she doesn't have the greatest attitude. But since she has moved with my g-ma she is always asking me to take her to my youth group but she gets mad at me when she doesn't make any friends because she kinds of scares them away. And she keeps critisizing me, my friends, my parents and how they parent me. It gets really old and I can't say anything or she will go crying to my dad how horrible I am and stuff. But if you asked all my friends and stuff I am a great kid. But now my aunt just ditched my other cuz so now he lives up here. what am I suppose to do. I don't want to deal with my g-ma getting pissed because I didn't invite them to a movie when I went with friends or every single thing like that. Its like I didn't make the decision of having them move here. It gets really old. What do you think I should do? Thanks
Answer:
Love them, they're family. Love is patient, and you must be patient with them. Your cousins are probably having a horrible time trying to adjust to your lifestyle.
Your first (meaning first one you spoke about) cousin is probably just getting critical of your life because she isn't well adjusted to it yet. Understand that, and as time goes on, the criticisms will lessen, and if I were you, I'd not treat her in any way that would add more fuel to the fire, so to speak. Transitions like this take time, and the stress she feels is probably going to end up as verbal backlash at you. Honestly, she might not even realize she's doing it. If you can, try to talk with her about it. Tell her you'd appreciate if she'd be a little more selective about what she says, and be kind and supportive of her situation, especially in prayer.
Answer:
hi!
Your cousins are dealing with alot of tuff stuff right now.That doesn't justify their attitude, but they probily feel kinda unwanted. You don't have to take them to every single thing you do, but maybe it helps them feel like they fit in. Taking them to youth group is a good idea, if they want to go, it might help them to be around positive influences. I'm sure your not a bad kid, but have you ever thought that your cousins might be a bit jealous of the stuff you take for granted? You have parents who love you, and it seems like you have some close friends too. This is probily going to be a hard change for your whole family. Pray for your cousins( you didn't say if they were christians or not) that they can recive the love, peace, best friend, and father that comes from knowing Jesus. Pray that they can find friends that will be good influences. It may take them a while, but things will probily change over time. Talk to your parents and grandma, tell them how you feel, in a kind way. I'm sure if they know whats going on, and they know that you are trying with your cousins, they might be slower to get angry. Show your cousins Jesus love, by caring about them. Make sure that they know that you care, if they need somone to talk to, or to just have fun and hang out with. If they act harsh, mean,ect. try to respond in a way that won't feed their fire. They are going through a hard time in their life, and you are too, having to get used to them. Be patent, Be kind and pray! I'll pray too!
" You were cleansed from your sins when you obeyed the truth, so now you must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply, with all your heart." 1 peter 1:22
" dear friends, let us continue to love one another, foe love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God." 1 john 4:7
Answer:
rainer, i wrote this the same time as you, just a bit late in posting it... we almost said the same stuff.... so i didn't want yuo to think i was coping! Weird! LOL!
Answer:
What are the ages of the people involved - you and your cousin(s)? That culd help shape some of the situation.
Answer:
I am 16, my first cousin is 17, and the third is 15(Ithink). MY cousins and I don't fight at all. Its pretty much my g-ma making things worse. I don't mind taking them to youth group. But like when my g-ma finds out I went to a movie with friends, she gets mad because I Didn't invite my cousins and it realyl was a situation were I Couldn't invite them. But my mom is going through the same thing with my g-ma and my dad somewhat but there afraid to talk to my g-ma. And since I am younger she won't really listen to anything I say.