Question:
My brother is a Christian, but since he's become a teenager (He's fourteen months older than I am, and I'm 15), he's been REALLY rebellious. I know it's normal, but his logic is SOOOOO stupid! When I talk to him about why he doesn't like listening to Mom and Dad and other authority figures (Example: Mom and Dad told him not to get a cell phone, and he wasn't allowed to get one 'till he can drive, which isn't for a while. He bought one anyway. Had a few fights with Mom. Afterwards, she took the cell phone away. He got a hold of it again. Started using it [One of those pre-paid cards]. Ran it almost out of service. She took it away again. Now he's whining about it AGAIN.). His logic: I don't see the point in it, so I don't wanna obey it. When I try to convince him that the Bible says to honor your father and mother, he goes off on how he never really understood that part of the Bible, and doesn't really care about it, basically. He knows what it says, but refuses to listen. He's done a bunch of junk that is not allowed, and is planning to (without permission) call some girls he knows long distance. He was also planning on calling someone in California, and we live in Virginia. He doesn't even KNOW the Californian... Bleh... I'm venting here, but I'd really like to know what to do. I have no idea.
Answer:
He is just trying to prove that he's a man. All he needs is a powerful intellectual trimming-down.
Answer:
1) Take a deep breath!
Ok, now, feel better?
2) The first thing you need to do is get a grip on what your responsibilities are and what they are not. I know you love your brother, that's a good thing, but loving your brother is not defined by your 'fixing' him. Your responsibility lies in demonstrating to him just what you believe. It's not telling him, it's demonstrating to him. You are a younger brother, as am I (I'm an old guy but my brother is older yet), and as such you will not be listened to if you try to tell him what to do or try to teach him something. You are his brother, not his parent. It's real easy to take on another person's burdens and that's counterproductive.
3) What you can do is to pray for him. Pray for him daily, ask the Lord to show you what you should do, ask Him to tell you what to say. If the Lord tells you what to say and when to say it, well - then you'll be alright because Holy Spirit will set him up for you, prepare him for what you are about to say. Keep yourself in the proper place, in obedience to God. If you do that you will not only protect yourself from the dangers of taking on your brother's responsibilities but you're placing yourself in a position where you can be used effectively by God in the situation.
4) Remember that if God has another plan, one in which you are not all that involved in your brother's healing/deliverance, He (God) is still in charge and will orchestrate the situation so that your brother will have every chance to turn back to Him.
God Bless you!
Bob
Answer:
Originally Posted by H.M. Murdock He is just trying to prove that he's a man. All he needs is a powerful intellectual trimming-down. Basically, if you don't understand what Jason is saying:
He needs a mental a star star kicking. Not sure that you are the one to get it. But someone needs to beat him down in a loving way.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Andrew Basically, if you don't understand what Jason is saying:
He needs a mental a star star kicking. Not sure that you are the one to get it. But someone needs to beat him down in a loving way. Let me add that the some one to beat your brother down will not be you. Who will it be? I dont know and you shouldn't go looking for them.
I would agree BRBob. The right thing for YOU to do IS listen to God and your parents and be an example to your brother rather than an authority. You will infact gain more respect from him by being obedient and just sharing the truth. Speak only what you know is right and what God leads you to say.
Other than that, keep doing what you know to be right.
Answer:
My advice is to only advise when he asks for it, unless he's really doing something particularly foolish (hey, I'm going to go get drunk with these college students and then we're going to go drive cars around narrow bridges!). Beyond that, be there for him, listen, and advise when he asks for it.
Answer:
Originally Posted by Andrew He needs a mental a star star kicking. Not sure that you are the one to get it. But someone needs to beat him down in a loving way. Precisely. He's too big for his own good, and he needs to get stabbed with a big pin.
That isn't to say someone should just mow him down. What he needs is a slow, sure, methodical, logical, involved, step-by-step teardown of everything he assumes about his existence with a total lack of anger in doing so. If there is anger, it is not a teardown right and proper- it's just a juvenile judgement session. A teardown is Socratic in nature, being entirely for the purpose of making one question what one believes, assumes, knows or does not know, and is currently doing.
That said, you aren't in a position to do so. If he asks, tell him what you think. But I doubt he will ask. He hasn't in the past, has he?
Answer:
No, he hasn't asked, though I admit I've tried to tell him... It didn't work, as anyone could guess. Thank you guys for all of the replies, I got something out of it, which I find good .